Welcome to Between The Covers, my monthly blog about erotic romance in the news! My name is Rebecca Gillan. Sometimes I come across stories that look like normal people doing normal people stuff. And sometimes I come across stories that sound like someone tried to re-enact their favorite scene from a romance novel and it didn’t go so well. Once a month, on the first Friday of the month, I share some of these juicy gems. So grab your popcorn and enjoy the ride!
I’m starting this month’s blog off with a dare. Yes, I am actually daring you to do something that might land you in my blog. In all fairness, I will be participating in this dare, as well. You see, I am flying to visit family this holiday season and we all know that means your choice of being scanned by the naked imaging machine or getting felt up by a TSA screener. You can get mad about it or you can get even with the little pervs. I am going to get even. Specifically, I am going to get some light reflecting tape and write the words “Oh, No! Boobies!” across my torso before I leave for the airport.
My dare is for everyone reading this blog who also plans to take a flight to write similar vulgarities under their clothes with reflective tape. The TSA director appears to not care that he is humiliating people by singling out cancer survivors. Then I say we ought to humiliate the TSA right back! The best part is: no one will know why the TSA screeners are turning bright red and giggling or getting pissed. And no one will suspect you because you will look like a normal person dressed in travel appropriate attire.
I am submitting this blog on 11/22 and flying on 11/25, so by the time of publishing, I will have already done this. Keep your eyes peeled to the comments section- that’s where I’ll post the results of the dare. Now I am just guessing that light reflective tape will work because, frankly, no one is admitting to just how sensitive these naked imaging machines are. I guess we’ll all find out soon.
And on to other Superman-esc news: if slapping tape on your belly is too prankish for your tastes, you can buy yourself some underpants that are reported to be x-ray proof! For about $20, you can buy a pair of skivvies with either a fig leaf or, in the case of women’s underpants, a pair of folded hands obscuring your crotch. The running theory for these shorts is that they very likely will stop anyone from being able to see your privates, but it’s just going to earn you a strip search.
In the event you do choose to wear x-ray proof underpants and end up getting the predicted strip search, might I suggest you also be wearing this innovative bra? It is sexy, stylish, and doubles as a pair or gas masks in the event of an emergency. Unlike the fig leaf briefs, though, at $30 plus shipping and handling, the “emergency bra” is actually on par, cost wise, with other comparable bras. I admit, I did order one of these. I had to. There was just something undeniably silly yet appealing about it. And yes, it is comfortable.
Lets face it, we cannot trust our safety to the government in this day and age of the undie bomber. We need to keep ourselves safe. Why not do it by using our underwear? It’s what got us into this scrape in the first place! And remember to have a little fun from time to time, but keep it between the covers or you might end up in the police blotter- or on this blog!
P.S. Feel free to add your own takes on how to keep yourself safe and sane in a world that is increasingly nuts. I bet I’m not the only one who can come up with fun scenarios and I’d love to hear yours!