Inside love’s its unexpected connections
My readers know I’m not a straight romance writer nor am I prone to use sentimentality in my work. “Man gets woman and they live happily ever after” isn’t my strong suit, partly because my cynical nature doesn’t allow me to believe it, mostly because life is an evolving process that requires continuous growth, both within and without. Thus my hard stories that bring my characters beyond conventionality and challenge their beliefs, their prejudices if not their clichés in order to go to the heart of what really matters, transcending the superficiality of many relationships.
So I come to love, perhaps the most frequent cliché of all, but having St. Valentine right around the corner, it seems inevitable however many its misconceptions. Let’s take love at first sight, for example. Does it exist? Attraction, yes, definitely, the pull of the senses that melts hearts and stomachs with the craving to be with the one person, and no other, the blood racing with the closeness and the heightened perception of the senses. This is something real, physical reactions we can all relate to, which strangely enough happen also when there’s no love involved. And if many of my characters fall under this sensual spell, there are some like Christopher Templeton who hates women, yet cannot resist Ylianor Meyer’s tempting body
Gone all inhibitions, Chris’s desires ran wild, unsettling his usual self-assured nature until he doubted his lifetime convictions as the craving for Ylianor spiralled to a spasmodic level, wanting her with a fiery intensity that would have shocked him, had he not been under this odd spell. Resisting the urge to have her in ways his rational side had strenuously opposed seemed his only strategy at first, but when it failed, it left him with an unbearable ache only the damned woman could quench.
So when Duncan was pumping the wet cunt of her sprawled frame with legs circling Prince Caldwell’s waist to take his cock deeper, Chris could not resist temptation any longer. After plunging his demanding shaft in her yielding mouth, he watched his lover’s screwing until he could not bear the overwhelming need to taste her—something he had refused to do not just with Ylianor, but with any woman, never having kissed one, not even by mistake, nor stroked the tantalizingly silky skin, solely interest in the two available holes, mouth and ass. Everything else, including the pussy, was superfluous to his way of thinking so never had he felt any particular inclination to explore Ylianor beyond the satisfying pumping of either or both of her cavities. But none of these reminders could stop him from slipping out of her warm mouth as if someone else controlled his body, replacing the thick shaft with his tongue.
Shocked, Ylianor had flung her eyes open, her questioning green gaze staring at him and again, he could not prevent the husky whisper escaping his lips. “The gods help me, I want to taste you all over.” Then he had taken her mouth forcefully, like a conqueror on an expedition to claim the land as his own. His tongue ravished the sweet opening, which Ylianor surrendered immediately to his avid attentions, while his teeth bruised her soft lips as he went farther than mere kisses. In a frenzy, he wanted to swallow her, so he sucked her tongue all the way to his throat, grazing it with his teeth, holding it prisoner to allow him to sweep her at ease. Surprisingly, he loved her taste and wanted to drown in it, filling his senses with it in the hope it would never wash away. And the more he drank, the wider she opened as if sensing he would accept nothing but total compliance with his demands, whatever they would turn out to be.
Well, he had several in mind, even if they all began and ended with Ylianor.
No, love can’t just be the explosion of the senses however important that is in a relationship. No, to me it’s hard work, a slow building process earned with the sweat of a soul struggling to breach the distance with another soul and establish a connection that didn’t exist until they met, then took a form all its own like in Ilenio’s case
M/M excerpt from Visionquest
This time I directed the thought to him directly before I had to give voice to my feelings, even if the only way to make him understand was to lay my soul bare, which I did, pulling him inside me with a forceful tug. “My life was empty before I met you. I was just a simple puppy in a small village, an ignorant peasant destined to slave and work hard for a piece of bread, surviving only for the sake of my poor children.” I reached for my hair and unfastened them, letting the strands tumble down in disorderly fashion. Then I covered him with them, hair falling all over him, my groin pressing to his rear while my hands came around to embrace him. “True, what you’re offering is so much more dangerous than that quiet, simple, uneventful life.” I whispered in his ear. “However, it has nothing of the excitement, the power, the energy you’ve brought forth, a treasure that would’ve remained buried within if you hadn’t plucked it out.” I ran my fingers through his hair, mixing them with mine, enjoying the contrast of colors. “You complete my life now. Your strength overwhelms me, your human and beast side filling my every sense until there’s nothing left of me but you. And if I have to trade my life to feel just one more second of this…” I paused. “I will without any hesitation or regrets because however long or short, I’ll have lived it to the fullest, enjoying every second of it as if it had lasted not twice, but three or four times over.”
He shivered in my embrace, though I realized it was his tense muscles relaxing completely at these words as relief spread in both of us. Are you sure, little one?
Absolutely! Bending to bury my nose in his neck and hair, I breathed deeply of his scent. I want to stay with you, be your slave and guide at whatever cost, so please don’t send me away.
He managed to twist around, his gray gaze capturing mine. “And I won’t.” With a solemn look, he crossed his heart. “For as long as you want to stay.”
Then he tilted my chin up and my heart almost burst out of my chest with the stomach-crunching desire to taste him at least once the way lovers do, even if we were nothing like them. Senses spinning out of control, I worked hard to silence the insatiable craving and was about to re-establish some semblance of order when he kissed me at last, his lips pressing on mine, his tongue forcing my mouth open to receive the full taste of him, finally. Even before seeing him with young Bharton had spiraled my longing, I had dreamed, hoped, fantasized about this moment so many times, I thought I’d shatter in a million pieces simply because he gave me what he had long denied for reasons all his own. Instead, I surrendered completely, not just my mouth, but my entire body melting into his, holding nothing back, freely surrendering whatever part of me he wanted—everything at his disposal and at his convenience.
So he took me, right there on the castle tower, leaning against the cold wall with my legs spread out and ass pushed back as his thick cock sank to the hilt before banging, in slow motion at first. But he couldn’t keep it up for long. Overcome by the heat of passion, which burned with the most gigantic fire I could remember, probably because he was echoing his sensations over mine, everything uncoiled from the pit of my shaft to explode against the wall as his pounding grew unbearably sweet and his frenzied twitching told me he was coming all over my ass.
And finally, unrequited love, too, is quite an acceptable solution particularly for soul mates starting with Martin (To Seduce A Soulmate) and his need to seduce what should be his by definition, and Sean (Tasting Leon’s Mark), struggling with his own connection to Leon, a man he manages to corner in Re-Scue.
M/M excerpt from To Seduce A Soulmate
Martin stretched across the table. “Just answer me honestly. Before you met me, have you ever felt you recognized a complete stranger before in your life? Or felt an electrical current run through your body merely by standing next to someone? Or felt your heart beat so fast you feared it might fall out of your chest?”
With a heavy heart, Drake realized there was no point in lying so he had to shake his head in denial, long hair flying around.
“But you did the moment you saw me, right?”
Having felt all that Martin had described, if not more, Drake’s head reluctantly gave in to tentative nod in agreement with the devil’s insight.
“And you still need more proof?”
“I don’t think these signs mean anything. My first crush was surprisingly similar to what you just described…except the recognition part, but that may be a trick of the mind.”
Martin eyed him coldly. “Suit yourself, Pirate. You’re free to believe what you like and I’m not going to convince you. It would be a wasted effort. On my part, I’m just happy to know I’m not crazy.”
M/M unedited from Re-Scue
Sean looked at the knife hanging in mid-air. It amazed him that Leon would be willing to give up the game, sacrificing their sex and blood connection for some unknown future. Of course, it was just the heat of the moment. If Sean had allowed it, Leon would have regretted it later. The game was their connecting bond, not just physically, but mentally and spiritually. The knife went deeper than skin, touching more than one level of existence, so before it slipped from Leon’s fingers, Sean reached out and grabbed his hand.
“If you promise to control your temper, there’s no need to throw away the knife.” He watched as Leon placed it on the table, next to the coffee cup. Then he took a deep breath. “I want our game back, but I can’t live by your fucking rules anymore. I don’t expect you to feel the same about me.” His voice grew husky. “I can accept the fact that love can be one way only. What I don’t accept is that I’m not free to express my feelings for you.” He sighed. “I particularly don’t want you storming out or…killing me for being in love with you. I’ve tried so hard to play it your way and be your detached toy, but it’s wearing me down. I pretended that all I cared for was the sex and blood, but I was only fooling myself.” He took a deep breath. “I love you! There’s never been anyone else in my life…all my lives, comparable to you. When I’m with you, it’s much more than just sex or blood. I feel the connection that goes far deeper than skin level and it makes the game so much better.” He caressed Leon’s face. “What I’m trying to tell you is that I love you. I love the hunt, the chase, the surrender, the beating heart and the adrenaline pumping wildly whenever I’m close to you. It’s pure torture at work, being next to you without being able to touch you. In the middle of a meeting, I’d love to get up and kiss you right there, in front of everybody. When you talk of business, all I think about is how much I want you to fuck me. I want to shout it to the entire world, yet I keep my mouth shut for convenience sake, and because you’d slice me in a million pieces if I dared.”