Welcome to Between The Covers, my monthly blog on Whipped Cream Guests about erotic romance in the news! This month, I’m covering a whole range of holidays, from Valentine’s Day, New Years, Mardi Gras and 11/11/11 Day, or what ever they end up calling that day. I have to admit, I just don’t get the hype about it. It’s cool to write down, sure, but there are funny looking dates every year. Enough with odd numerology, though. Let’s get down to the odd news!
This past Valentine’s Day was a rough one for a… ok, he wasn’t a gentleman. He was a doofus. But it was a rough one for him. He walked into a bar, saw a table full of what he thought were fine women. So he hangs out and drinks with them for several hours. He even buys them a round. Then at some point, he realizes they weren’t women but rather men in drag. His wholly drunken reaction to this was not to attack the group that he’d been trying to romance, though. It was to trash the bar. The article doesn’t say what made him realize his mistake but I suspect his beer goggles fell off towards the end.
To be honest, trashing a bar is pretty minor compared to this next guy. After having a relationship go sour, a man in Minnesota stuffed a sex toy with gun powder and BBs then rigged a trigger to the battery port. It gets worse: the slime ball, who’d been given a place to live by his intended victim, wrapped his special bomb and marked it as a Christmas gift. Luckily, Mr. Slimy wasn’t too bright and told one of the other people living in the apartment what he’d done. That roommate called the cops and Mr. Slimy spent the second most romantic day of the year--New Year’s Eve-- behind bars.
An interesting theme for this year’s Mardi Gras celebration has become the talk of the town Down Under, scheduled for March 5th. There will be at least 15 floats in Australia’s New Mardi Gras parade dedicated to that country’s ban on same sex marriage. There is even an entry this year sponsored by the Queer Animal Liberation group. I had no idea that there was a need for queer animal rights. In another equally bizarre story, I found that another animal rights group was rejected for not being queer enough. I hate to make blanket statements, but after last month’s report of Aussies riding blow-up dolls down a flood-swollen river, I am forced to. Australians are some very odd ducks. And as they are a day ahead of us, I will be looking for news coverage online today because I just gotta know what’s up with the cyber punk cheerleaders.
Last but not least, a bit of cheerful, sexy news. Someone sat down and did the math and discovered that Valentine’s Day sex this year could result in a babies being born on 11/11/11. Of course, there are many other variables that could throw it off, the first being that you have to have been fertile at the time. Let us not spoil the fun with facts, though. The idea of making love to your soul mate on Valentine’s Day and conceiving on that sacred day for lovers is probably the single most romantic thing I have ever heard of. You may or may not have made the cut to get a goofy birth date for a little one this year, but Valentine’s Day comes around every year!
Remember folks, there’s nothing wrong with letting your inner id take you to adventurous places. But keep it between the covers or you might end up in the police blotters- or on this blog!
P.S. Feel free to add your own takes on any of these stories in the comments section. I bet I’m not the only one who can come up with fun scenarios and I’d love to hear yours!